Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Delayed reaction

Jenny tagged me, a while back. (Sorry)

The rules:
a. Link to the person who tagged you.
b. Post the rules on your blog.
c. Write six random things about yourself.
d. Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.
e. Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment at their blog.
f. Let your tagger know when your entry is up.

1. While I was growing up, I had a pony named Peggy and then a horse named Mikie. I didn't name either one.
2. I studied sciences and then history at university, but left before I got my degree in order to work full time at the business I had started with my then-boyfriend (husband now.) Still doing it, 14 years later.
3. I hate pea soup, love cheese.
4. I like to travel, but I think I'll always live in Nova Scotia.
5. I'm the oldest of four children - we're spaced over 21 years.
6. I've just realized how dull I really am.

And sorry, but it looks like everyone I know has already done this!

Monday, April 21, 2008

on a sunny April morning

Wonderful co-worker leaves on Friday. I have today and one more day off, and you betcha I'm making the most of it.

I've spent the whole month of April focusing on my family, soaking up as much of the kids as I can. I know, it's not like I'm sailing away for three months at sea, I'll be home every night at six-thirty to play and read and tickle, and mid-afternoon on Saturdays to hang out in the backyard and push the swing. Still, I feel like there's a separation coming, and it's bringing a lot of little things into focus and stirring up complex emotions that I want to express, but can't. Sometimes there just isn't language to cover this motherhood thing.

I've written very little, but I feel the story happening. I hear my characters laughing softly under blankets, and I'm puzzled because they certainly weren't sleeping together the last time I checked in with them. Carrie seems stronger now, maybe she's putting her losses aside - if not behind her - at least not cradling them in her arms any more. She's finding peace, and soon I will sit down with her and she'll tell me all about it. She knows I need this time, and she'll wait.

Tonight for supper we're having Sesame Ginger pork on the grill.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

How to have a good day

1. Subjugate your will to that of the nearest two-year-old. Sip imaginary tea from a cracked plastic cup that used to be yours back in the seventies. Read a board book three times over. Lay on the floor in a patch of sunlight with an orange cat, and listen to your daughter sing the alphabet, starting with the first letter, which is Q.

2. Dig something up - for instance, the tall yellow-flowered perrenial (latin name tall yellowus thingus) that, through lack of planning, got planted between the other two tall yellowus thinguses. Use your bare hands to fill in the hole, and don't forget to consult with your six-year-old about the best destination. He's right.

3. Be with your son in the moment when he loses his first tooth. If you're lucky, you'll get to pluck it out yourself, with no pain and very little blood. Cry a little if you need to, he is growing up so fast.

4. Take time to appreciate your daughter's imagination. Who else would think to paint a bedspread using a toothbrush and Vaseline?

5. Shut up. Stop trying to control everything. Leave the muddy footprint where it landed and pour yourself a glass of wine to sip while you cook supper.

6. Cuddle in the dark and watch a movie with your husband.

7. Don't worry that you only wrote a few hundred words. You did some very important stuff today, after all.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Huge Sigh

I've had some hard news this week - my wonderful co-worker is moving on the first of May. I'm really sad to see her go, we share the same irreverent sense of humour and she's good at the job. I'm also pretty sad about going back to a six-days-a week work schedule.

I'm not excited about hiring. I'm so tired of that process.

Anyway, I have April. I'm going to take some extra days off to be with the kids, and when that's over I'll do what I have to do. I have lots of support, it's not the end of the world.

It might be the end of my getting 10 000 words a month, though. For now.

So I'm a little bummed right now.