This morning my desk is such a mess I put on some music from the 1980s and danced while I got vicious tearing up little Post-It notes with cryptic messages and names of people I should probably know who they are. I'm done with them. (The notes. Not the people.)
Nothing's wrong, I just can't hear my own voice any more.
I made coffee with a spoon I thought might be dirty OK FINE I knew for sure it was dirty I used it yesterday.
Mercury is in retrograde and the people OH MY GOD the people are crazy. I didn't used to believe in this stuff until I worked in retail for 20 years and now I can tell you HELL YES I don't know why or how but people change. You can Google that if you don't believe me. Or just continue to don't believe me if you want. We can still hang out.
But a woman brought her kid into my store and let her play with the toys on the windowsill for TWO HOURS.
A man refused to pay his bill and then he sent me an email saying he thought I was pretty rude about that.
So they're gone now and I stop and I listen and I think, where am I? Not physically; I can point myself out on a map thank heavens. But the part that makes me ME, the girl who used to have interesting thoughts and a few friends, whose day wasn't taken up with a colour-coded to-do list arranged in priority sequence.
I have voicemail now, the light flashes and it's very distracting. Who can think when there's a red flashing light on her desk? And isn't every single item on this to-do list actually a red flashing light?
And now I hear a voice. It's quiet, and it comes from the warm place just behind my ear.
The only way out is through, that's what it says. So I sigh, and reach for the phone.